Confession of a sordid affair
The strangest thing happened today. Although, this blog has in no way been an account of daily experiences - this incident deserves special attention.
A medium sized cockroach climbed on my bed and was scurrying towards me. I brushed it so it fell on the floor. I am normally kind towards insects, I have many times picked the carcasses of moths and butterflies on pavements and construction sites and buried them under a tree.
It could have been the same with the cockroach had it scampered away on its own course. But our man fell on his back. I watched on as it struggled to get back up on its feet but did nothing to help him. I was genuinely curious to see what would happen.
For the next couple of minutes, it would wiggle and twist its body frantically for a while and then pause as if to regain some of its energy before trying again. Clearly it was in a state of panic.
The floor was slippery and there wasn't a wall or the leg of a furniture in its vicinity to help him.
I marvelled at its spirit to remain alive and its courage to not give up trying. I could have but didn't help it back on its feet.
Amused I returned my attention to my work - in the meanwhile our annoying neighbourhood cockroach had flipped itself over on its feet like a pancake.
Tentative as if not able to believe itself, it tries to walk. Finding it difficult, it starts flexing its fore legs and hind legs as if to regain strength for the journey ahead.
Miraculously strength returns to its feet and it slowly begins to walk away.
What I do next is abominable and will continue to haunt me for a long time - I brought out the can of insecticide and sprayed at it till it died. It is despicable that I took its life away when it had just got a second chance at life, when it had probably just begun to discover how much it want to survive.
At that instant, I wasn't a man or a woman, I had no beliefs, all my skills and knowledge didn't stop me from letting the little cockroach free. This is the truth of my today and I can regret all I want but what is done now will not be undone.
P.S - Spot settlement of karma : I inhaled a lot of the poisonous insecticide as a result of spraying too much and not using a mask - this doesn't make us even, but hope you forgive me, my friend.
A medium sized cockroach climbed on my bed and was scurrying towards me. I brushed it so it fell on the floor. I am normally kind towards insects, I have many times picked the carcasses of moths and butterflies on pavements and construction sites and buried them under a tree.
It could have been the same with the cockroach had it scampered away on its own course. But our man fell on his back. I watched on as it struggled to get back up on its feet but did nothing to help him. I was genuinely curious to see what would happen.
For the next couple of minutes, it would wiggle and twist its body frantically for a while and then pause as if to regain some of its energy before trying again. Clearly it was in a state of panic.
The floor was slippery and there wasn't a wall or the leg of a furniture in its vicinity to help him.
I marvelled at its spirit to remain alive and its courage to not give up trying. I could have but didn't help it back on its feet.
Amused I returned my attention to my work - in the meanwhile our annoying neighbourhood cockroach had flipped itself over on its feet like a pancake.
Tentative as if not able to believe itself, it tries to walk. Finding it difficult, it starts flexing its fore legs and hind legs as if to regain strength for the journey ahead.
Miraculously strength returns to its feet and it slowly begins to walk away.
What I do next is abominable and will continue to haunt me for a long time - I brought out the can of insecticide and sprayed at it till it died. It is despicable that I took its life away when it had just got a second chance at life, when it had probably just begun to discover how much it want to survive.
At that instant, I wasn't a man or a woman, I had no beliefs, all my skills and knowledge didn't stop me from letting the little cockroach free. This is the truth of my today and I can regret all I want but what is done now will not be undone.
P.S - Spot settlement of karma : I inhaled a lot of the poisonous insecticide as a result of spraying too much and not using a mask - this doesn't make us even, but hope you forgive me, my friend.
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